To Love Again
by Little Miss Bovver
Summary: A fic that follows Kelly through the first season through her tweets on Twitter. Rated M for language and a sexy dream. Light Kelly/Nathan. Posted on LJ.


**Title: **To Love Again  
**Pairings/Characters: **Kelly, ensemble, light Nathan/Kelly, minor Kelly/Lee, plus minor characters.  
**Rated: **M for language and sexual situations.  
**Word Count:** 6,013  
**Disclaimer: **I do not own any of these characters or the tweets. Everything belongs to E4.  
**A/N:** Well, I was reading through Kelly's tweets on Twitter last night and thought about how I could make a plot out of this. Nathan's jokes are taken from his Twitter. I own nothing and spoilers for season one.

To Love Again

**Cant belive I got community service 4 one little headbutt **

1:52 PM Oct 29th 

'You have _got_ to be fucking kidding me.'

'No, Kelly, I'm not kidding you,' the woman replies. Kelly curls her lip, disgusted, and sits back in the chair with her arms folded over her chest.

'She started it! She shouldn't have been calling me a slag. How come she gets away with fuck all?'

'Kelly, you broke her nose in the middle of a store,' Susanna Whyte says, as she begins to slip her paperwork back into a brown file. Her dark hair is pulled into a bun as she casts a look over Kelly. 'You'll be starting the community service next Thursday. I expect you to be there.'

'This isn't fair!' scowls Kelly. Susanna gets to her feet.

'Well, maybe if you improved your behaviour instead of being so aggressive all the time, you wouldn't be in this situation.'

'Oh, fuck off.'

Susanna sighs, placing her palms flat against the table as she leans forward. 'Exactly my point, Kelly. Sort your life out.' She straightened up, picking up the brown folder and leaving the room. Kelly gives a growl as she kicks the leg of the table.

It just isn't fair!

**lee wanted to shove a firewk up my dog keith's arse. I sed he cud if he did it on himself first. wozn't the big man after that. Chickin. LOL **

5:54 PM Nov 6th 

Kelly looks down at the tag on her ankle, twisting her foot this way and that to catch the different angles. 'Does it look too obvious?' she asks. Lee glances up from where he is knelt on the floor, play wrestling with Keith. The dog growls, tail beating the air.

'I don't think anyone will see it if you wear your jeans over it,' he replies, as Keith leaps forward and snaps the ball out his hand, very nearly taking his fingers off. 'Fuck,' he winces, inspecting his hand as Keith trots away. 'He's lucky my hand is still intact, or I would have shoved a firework up his arse and see how he liked that.'

Kelly sends a kick his way. 'You can if you do it on yourself first. And leave Keith alone, he doesn't know better.'

Lee grins, shifting onto the sofa and grabbing a cushion. He bats Kelly across the head with it and Kelly glares at him. 'You're going to get it now,' she says, grabbing another cushion and hitting him back. Lee laughs, putting his hands on her waist and pulling her down on him. He kisses her and Kelly smiles, shaking her head. 'You're a dick,' she states.

'You love me really,' he says, hands slipping into the backs of her jeans as he draws her closer.

**3 thngs. 1. jodi u can shut it. 2. lee b rnd l8r. 3. No prty on thrsdy. Got commnty srvc. Bag o shite **

5:24 PM Nov 9th 

'You'll never guess what Jodi's been going around saying,' Cheryl says to Kelly one afternoon. They are sitting in the children's park, watching Cheryl's little boy, Ryan, run around the slide with some other children. It's cold, the November chill making Kelly shiver slightly. 'I saw her over at Aidan's party on Tuesday and she was chatting all this shit about knocking you out when you had that fight.'

'What the fuck?' scowls Kelly. 'She's a fucking liar. I laid that bitch out, she didn't even touch me.'

'I know,' Cheryl says, nodding. Kelly unscrews the cap on her Coke Cola bottle and takes a drink. 'Can I borrow your pink top on Thursday for Darren's party?' she asks. 'You know, the one-shouldered one?'

'Sure,' Kelly says. 'I'll come around yours in the morning and… shit.'

'What?' Cheryl asks.

'I've got fucking community service, I can't come.' Kelly screws the cap back on the bottle and slams it down. 'For fuck sake, this is taking the piss.'

'Well, look on the bright side,' Cheryl points out. 'At least you'll be able to spend the night with Lee when you get back from… what will you be doing?'

'Who the fuck knows?' Kelly says, shaking her head. 'It's bullshit. I have much better ways to spend my time than cleaning shit up or whatever the fuck they'll make me do.'

'I feel sorry for you,' Cheryl says, sympathetically. Kelly nods, as Ryan runs over.

'Come swing!' he says; three years old, with a mop of dark hair and big brown eyes. Kelly smiles and gets to her feet, allowing the little boy to lead her over to the swings.

Yeah, at least she had Lee to come home to. That's all that mattered.

**Saw thing on telly about Kerry Katona's first wedding they had napkins with Kerry n Brian 4 eva on them. Am gonna do the same for me and Lee **

10:50 AM Nov 11th 

It's late and Kelly is curled up on the sofa with Lee, his arm around her, and they're watching some Kerry Katona show on TV. It's nice when it's like this, just the two of them with Keith snoozing on the rug.

Lee's hand is tracing patterns on her arm and she shuts her eyes, breathing in his familiar scent. He's wearing the aftershave she bought him for his birthday and when he laughs at something on the TV, it rumbles through him and into her.

Kelly smiles, comfy and happy and in love. She's in love with him. They are getting married, she was going to be Mrs Kelly Turner.

Nothing could go wrong with them. Nothing.

**! **

10:05 PM Nov 12th 

Kelly has never felt like this before. She's sat on the bed, head in her hands, tears streaking down her cheeks and Keith is whining and watching her.

_Come on, I need a piss. Just let me out so I can go. Come on, let me out or I'll shit all over your new carpet. Come on, come on, let me out…_

'Shut the fuck up!' Kelly screams at the dog, because she shouldn't be able to hear that! She shouldn't be able to hear what he was thinking, what Lee had been thinking.

Screwing around. He thought she was a slag. Fresh tears burst free as Kelly stomps out of her bedroom. She opens the door for Keith. The dog races outside and Kelly slams it shut behind him.

It is over. Her and Lee are nothing now and she can't believe it. She pulls the ring off her finger and tosses it across the room. _I can't believe I gave her that ring. _The words are still fresh in her mind, the image of him standing there and thinking _that_ imprinted behind her eyelids.

She loves him. It isn't supposed to end like this, never supposed to end at all. Kelly can't see, her vision blurred by tears so she sinks down to her knees and presses her face into the rug and just cries.

**Stupid bastard! Close the d... **

10:40 PM Nov 12th 

She's dead. She's not supposed to be dead, but she guesses you don't really get to chose when you die. All she remembers is Curtis opening the door and she tried to stop him she really did and look what's happened, there's blood everywhere…

**... d eht esolc !dratsab diputS **

10:40 PM Nov 12th 

It never happens. It's some crazy dream where she can read minds and Curtis has turned back time to save her life and it has to be a dream because this doesn't happen in real life. Probation workers don't kill ASBO kids in real life.

She'll wake up soon, she thinks for sure as they run down the corridor to get away from Tony, the blood-crazed zombie look-alike probation worker. She shouldn't have head-butted him, she knows that. But, he shouldn't have been grabbing at her. It was self-defence.

She'll wake up soon, she thinks again, as Nathan slips in a pool of blood and Curtis approaches the locker. She'll wake up and Lee will cradle her in his arms and tell her it was all a bad dream…

**That Irish bloke needs his eyebrows plucking. **

10:58 PM Nov 12th 

It turns out not to be a dream, but at least they are still alive. Tony is dead, along with that Gary and the group have buried them beneath the flyover and now have to act as if they don't know anything.

Except some woman comes in, wanting to know what they know and Nathan spins some bullshit story about Tony and Gary in a gay relationship, fucking each other in toilets and running off to Spain or wherever. Kelly rolls her eyes, because it doesn't even sound a little bit true. He should have stayed quiet, really, but now he's doing actions and Kelly can only stare, partly in disgust, partly in disbelief. Is he serious? He's fucking insane, she knows that, and such a dickhead.

Kelly wants to twat him right now, as does everyone else by the looks of things and the new probation worker turns and walks to the office without another word. She looks about ready to cry and Kelly narrows her eyes.

'What part of 'stay fucking quiet' don't you understand?' she demands in a hushed voice so Sally won't hear. Nathan just grins, arrogant fuck and Kelly punches him in the chest and stalks away.

'Violence solves nothing!' he yells after her, rubbing his chest.

Bastard.

**took back ring that me x bought n swopped it 4 a toastie maker. Argos are v good at refunds **

12:32 PM Nov 16th 

Her new toaster is pink and can toast four slices of bread at a time. Kelly plugs it in next to the microwave which Lee's mum gave them and starts to make toast.

She makes plates of it. She doesn't even eat it all, just keeps cooking until she's toasted three and a half loaves of bread, plates piled high with toast that she has no desire to eat.

She just wants to get the best out of her toaster. She bought it with the engagement ring she exchanged at Argos. She wants the toaster to be more useful than any ring Lee could give her.

She likes the pink toaster better anyway.

**babysat little ryan 4 me mate cheryl. sed he wants an ankl tag jst like me. aah Sweet! **

4:36 PM Nov 18th 

Cheryl has asks Kelly to baby-sit for her, because her and her man, Aidan, are having a night out. It's their one year anniversary together; he isn't Ryan's dad, but close enough. For a seventeen year old, he took the role of dad perfectly. Even Kelly is impressed.

Ryan is pulling Keith's ears and Keith is too busy thinking about the neighbour's Poodle to care. _Doggie is soft. Soft ears. Mummy let me have a doggie? I hope so, I will ask her and if I am good, mummy will let me have one for Christmas. _

His thoughts are sweet and makes Kelly smile. 'Do you want some chicken nuggets?' she asks him. Ryan nods.

'Can I watch TV?' he asks, a little shy as he looks up at her through his lashes. _Works on mummy, works on mummy, works on mummy_.

He knows how to get what he wants, Kelly thinks with a grin. 'What do you want to watch?' she asks, moving to kneel by the TV and open up the small cupboard next to it. Inside, it's filled with DVDs and at the bottom are a few for Ryan; she baby-sit's a lot.

'Iggle Piggle,' he says, leaning against the shoulder, already with the remote in his hand. Kelly slides out one of the In The Night Garden DVDs, one about Makka Pakka cleaning faces with his sponge and in a few minutes, she has it playing and is back in the kitchen, cooking chicken nuggets. She can hear one of the songs, hear Ryan singing along and Kelly sits on the counter and is alone with her thoughts.

Something has happened to them all; she can read minds. She can hear peoples thoughts, knows exactly what people think now, whether she wants to know or not. Curtis can travel back in time, people lust for Alisha with a single touch, Simon can turn invisible. And Nathan can do nothing. For some reason, she is smug at this thought.

Might stop him being a smart-mouthed twat. She has to laugh at this, because it isn't likely. Ryan appears in the doorway, breaking her from her thoughts of Nathan and his grin, and asks for a drink.

'Juice?' she asks as she slides off the counter and goes to grab his small plastic Bob the Builder cup from the cupboard.

**got cmmnty srvc 2day. Shite. boys were ded annoyin. Not that I'm lookin, only jus split wiv Lee. **

1:23 PM Nov 19th 

'I think,' Nathan announces in the locker room, 'that we should all play charades.'

'Charades?' Curtis questions. Nathan grins.

'Yes, I'll go first.' He made the action for 'Film'.

'The Lion King,' Kelly says easily. Nathan straightens up, looking put out.

'You can't cheat! No reading my mind.'

Kelly rolls her eyes and turns to the mirror, brushing her hair up into a high ponytail. Nathan starts again. This time, the answer is Beethoven's Seventh Symphony, but he still hasn't worked out how he will act it out. Kelly keeps quiet; just slips her brush back into her locker and zips up her orange jumpsuit a little more, because she can see Simon looking.

She turns, walking out and Alisha follows. 'Hey, you can't leave!' Nathan calls, as they file out one by one. He shakes a fist. 'I've not finished! You actually have to guess before you finish the game! You're all boring!'

He follows them into the main hall, where they have to put milk cartons in boxes to send to primary schools. Nathan takes one out the packet, spears the straw into the foil and starts to drink.

'Sally will have your balls if she sees you,' Curtis says as he starts packing up the cartons.

'How do you know she hasn't already had them?' Nathan points out, before squeezing the carton so milk spurts everywhere. 'Pawow! You see that? That's what I did all over her face last night.'

'Shut up,' Simon says and his fists are clenched as he glares at Nathan. Nathan stares back, before chucking the milk carton at him.

'Shut it, weird kid.'

'Leave him alone,' Kelly says to Nathan.

'Leave who alone?' he replies innocently, slipping off the table. Kelly slams a box on the table next to him.

'Simon,' she growls. 'Now, help me out here. I'm not doing all the work so you can just sit on your arse all day.' Nathan picks up a milk carton and sticks it in the box, before reaching over to grab another carton. He leans over her and she gets a smell of the aftershave he's used that morning, his firm body pressing lightly against her and she barely holds back a shiver.

'You like that, don't you,' he murmurs, so no one else can hear.

'Eugh, get away from me,' Kelly says, slamming a carton a little too viciously into the box, her voice higher than normal. 'You're such a dick.'

'You want me really,' Nathan replies, voice loud again. She elbows him in the side, before turning and stalking away. The others watch her leave and Kelly can only breathe normal once she is in the bathroom's, staring at her reflection in the mirror.

It's too soon after Lee. Too soon.

**Maybe he's a mental? Like them blokes that poo on women. **

10:52 PM Nov 19th 

Kelly is watching Simon. He's stood by the lockers, fists clenched at his side. His eyes are wide, bright blue, looking like a deer caught in the headlights. She never really understood that expression until now.

He's silent most of the time, because when he speaks, Nathan is usually there to shoot him down. She hates Nathan for that, always feeling bad for Simon.

But, she has to admit he is a little weird. His hair is always neat, the top button always done up.

Simon catches her gaze and offers a tentative smile, which Kelly returns. He isn't all that bad tho- _I wonder what she looks like naked. A naked chav, oh yeah._

Kelly's head snaps to Nathan, whose eyes widen as he realizes she heard. Then, he grins and winks and Kelly shakes her head and moves to stand closer to Simon.

At least Simon wasn't too perverted. She could handle him.

**had a dirty dream about one of cmmnty srvce guys. Not sayin who.**

2:44 PM Nov 20th 

His face is buried between her legs and she's fisting his curls, hips raising and bucking beneath his working tongue. Two fingers are nestled deep inside her to the knuckle and when he nips at her clit, pleasure shoots up her spine and sends thrills through her body.

They are in the locker room at the community centre, her back against a cool locker, orange all-in-ones discarded on the floor. Kelly bites her bottom lip, back arching and she so close, so nearly there.

'Nathan, _please_…'

Kelly jerks awake with a gasp, eyes wide as she stares up at the dark ceiling, breathing heavy. Her clothes are sticking to her body, sheets tangled around her legs and she kicks them off with a scowl.

She isn't supposed to be having dreams about Nathan like that. She didn't even like him, he was an idiot.

He better not invade her dreams again, or he'd know about it.

**Simon from cmmnty srvce filmed me on his fone 2day. I hate bein filmed. Lee wanted to make a porno once. Glad I dumped him.**

10:50 AM Nov 24th 

'Smoked my skunk?' Nathan asks, coming forward with Simon tailing him, phone held up as he films.

'F off,' Kelly replies.

'Why are you eating prawn cocktail crisps?' Nathan demands, snatching the packet out of her hands.

'Because I'm hungry,' Kelly replies, snatching them back.

'Yeah, but prawn cocktail?' Nathan says, turning to look back at the camera. 'They're strictly for munchies.' He looks straight back at Kelly, as she pops a few crisps into her mouth. 'And look at you, shovelling them in!'

'Oi!' she growls, warningly, but Nathan moves to grab her from behind, pulling her tight against his chest. She attempts to shake him off, annoyed now.

'Zoom in on her eyes!' Nathan yells at Simon.

'Simon, fuck off,' Kelly pleads. She's remembering the dream, the fact that it was Nathan she was with, can feel his firm torso pressing into her back…

'What do you see?' Nathan asks, holding her still.

'Eyes,' Simon states simply.

'What colour? Red ones?'

'Blue.'

Kelly just wants to eat her crisps.

'Big blue dilated eyes?'

'Not really.'

'Oh, stop it; you're being weird,' Kelly complains, attempting to shake Nathan off again.

'Aha!' Nathan grins, triumphantly. 'Paranoia.'

'Piss off,' Kelly sighs, finally managing to shove him off. Nathan looks after her as she finishes her crisps.

'You owe me!' he calls.

**I think Curtis fancies that Alisha. He was starin at her 2day. She stared back. But she stares at every bloke ever.**

3:26 PM Nov 24th 

Kelly knows she shouldn't sit and deliberately listen to peoples thoughts, but it passes the time and it is her power, so why not use it?

She's listening to Alisha and Curtis. He's staring at her, eyes on her backside as she bends over to pick up a bucket. He's grinning, before turning to continue scrubbing the wall.

_Can't wait for us to finish this. She looks beautiful when she comes._

Gross. Kelly wrinkles her nose and glances at Alisha. She's biting her bottom lip and watching the muscles in Curtis's arm bulge as he scrubs graffiti off the wall.

_I wish I didn't have this power. Then, Curtis would want to sleep with me and it would be special and proper. He'd remember it. _

Curtis notices Alisha's gaze and looks back at and for a moment, the two just look at each other. Kelly looks away, because they are in love and she has no one.

**im not talkin 2 her. im gonna hum the theme tune of Emmerdale in me hed. Dah dah dah dah dah, dah dah dah **

10:05 PM Nov 26th 

Jodi is the reason Kelly is here in the first place and there is no fucking way that Kelly is going to say shit to her. She doesn't even want to do this stupid let's-be-friends-and-make-daisy-chains-together make up session.

Kelly hates Jodi, Jodi hates Kelly. That's how it will always be and Kelly doesn't care.

No one calls Kelly a slag and gets away with it.

**I do hav a bawld fanny **

10:35 PM Nov 26th 

Kelly glares at her reflection in the mirror, staring at her bald head and gritting her teeth. 'I'm going to fucking kill her,' she hisses, because Jodi had done this to her.

Jodi had made her bald.

How the fuck does that even work?

Kelly is naked, inspecting every square inch of her body and there was no hair anywhere; no arm hair, leg hair and definitely no pubic hair.

She is completely bald.

An automatic smile comes to her lips as she remembers Nathan's words, asking if she was bald upstairs and down. Well, yes she was. Of course, she hadn't told him that.

Grabbing her nightgown, Kelly pulls it on.

She just prays it will grow back. Bald fanny is alright, she decides, but a bald head? No.

**hair's growing back at last. Smeone sed id look well fit as a boy but i thnk they woz takin th pss so I twtted em **

10:25 AM Dec 2nd 

They don't even need to say anything for Kelly to know what they were thinking. She's in the corner shop, putting a few pot noodles into her basket and some Rich Tea biscuits because she's looking after Ryan tomorrow night and they're his favourite.

_She looks like a man. Probably a dyke, by the looks of things. _'Look at that girl.' She hears the whispering and wishes that she'd worn her wig until her hair had grown back completely.

'Bet she'd be well fit as a boy,' another snorts and the two start to laugh, trying to hush themselves. Kelly turns on them.

'Do you want to shut the fuck up?' she snaps. One of the girls- a blond with an orange face and white neck- raises an eyebrow and squares up.

'Or what baldy? You'll get your razor on us?' Kelly comes forward, grabbing the girl by the hair and swinging her around. She drops the basket, pot noodles and rich teas scattering across the aisle as she punches the girl in the jaw. Throwing her down, she shoves the second girl into the shelves.

'I'm not a dyke,' she growls as the girl cowers and clambers to her feet, touching her cut lip. Kelly gathers her basket and puts her things back, before stalking towards the counter to pay.

_If I see her again, she'll get it, _Kelly hears, but ignores it, pays for her things and leaves.

**i h8 that I find him funny. he does stff like tht and i try ded hard not 2 laff. hes such a twat. **

10:03 PM Dec 3rd 

Kelly doesn't escape the locker rooms fast enough and Nathan snags her wrist before she can leave. 'So, I've got a joke for you.'

Kelly gives him a look and he continues.

'What did Santa get Michael Jackson for Christmas?'

'Nathan,' she groans.

'Patrick Swayze,' he grins. She punches his arm.

'That's mean. I loved Dirty Dancing.'

'_I loved Dirty Dancing,_' he mimics.

'Oh, fuck off, Nathan,' she snaps and goes to walk out, but he pulls her back again.

'Wait, wait, wait, I got another one,' he says. 'What do you call a granny rolling down a hill?'

'What?' she asks.

'Fucked.'

Admittedly, it was quite good. Kelly starts to laugh and he grins. 'Ha! I knew I could make you laugh,' he says and she shakes her head and tries to force the grin from her face. He holds her gaze, grin widening ever so slightly.

_I think I like her. _

Kelly's stomach turns at his thought, butterflies going crazy and she drops her gaze because she doesn't want to feel like this about him. 'It wasn't that good,' she says, but doesn't look at him again.

**Nathan is sutch a gobby dickhed…**

10:04 PM Dec 3rd 

It's the next day and the joke is forgotten. They are outside, lounging about on the bench. Nathan has a cigarette hanging out his mouth and Kelly is trying not to look. It's not really her fault that he looks hot. Kelly really needs to get out more because obviously spending too much time in this place is messing with her head.

'It's not my fault I've got a big dick!' Nathan is complaining about something Curtis just said. 'Your mum was begging for it.'

'Don't you speak about my mum like that,' Curtis says, voice low. Nathan holds his hands up in surrender.

'You're really going to have to talk to her about how much she drools during a simple blowjob though. I don't mind a bit of wet, but she's like a big, panting dog.'

Curtis is on his feet, towering over Nathan and Nathan smiles back, taking a slow drag of his cigarette.

'Leave it, Nathan,' Kelly says, sounding bored. Nathan's gaze doesn't leave Curtis' face and Kelly knows without having to read this thoughts that he enjoys getting a reaction out of him.

'Come on, Curtis,' Alisha says, getting to her feet. Curtis sighs, shaking his head at Nathan.

'Don't speak about my mum,' he says once again, before following Alisha inside. Nathan shakes his head, finishes his cigarette and flicks the still burning butt on the floor.

'What about your mum?' he finally says, looking at Kelly. Kelly raises an eyebrow.

'What about her?'

'Would she like a guy like me?' he asks. Kelly laughs.

'No, Nathan. She likes real men.' Nathan shifts closer on the bench and Kelly doesn't move. He leans in close. He smells like the cigarette he's been smoking.

'What about you?' he asks, quiet. Kelly says nothing and he smirks. It's a moment, before Kelly remembers Simon is there, quiet as ever and she pulls away, getting to her feet.

'We have work to do,' she says. Nathan just smiles.

**woke up in nite. had a nitemare bt cant rememba wot it woz. ate a pop tart to calm dwn, bt still thnk sum bad stuff is gonna hppn soon. **

11:12 AM Dec 4th 

It's almost three in the morning and Kelly is stood in the kitchen, leaning against the counter as she toasts her Poptart in the toaster she bought with the engagement ring.

She's shivering a little, eyes stinging with fatigue, but she can't sleep. She's had a nightmare, but as much as she tries, she can't remember what it had been about.

Something about a… a building? The community centre, she thinks. It's frustrating that she can't remember. She'd woken up shaking and scared and nearly in tears over this nightmare.

She rubs her eyes with a soft groan and a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach.

She isn't normally this superstitious, but she doesn't like this. Doesn't like it at all.

**wonder whos hardest out of nathan and simon? probly simon. i bet my gran cld have nathan + shes got an orfapeedic shoe **

10:00 PM Dec 10th 

Nathan is bugging Simon again and Simon is doing nothing, but glaring back at him. Kelly thinks he shouldn't take his shit, that Simon should fight back against him because Nathan is a pussy really.

'Hey, Weird Kid. Can I see your balls?'

'What?'

'Can. I. See. Your. Balls?'

Simon blinks slowly. 'Why?'

'To make sure you really have them.'

'I have balls,' Simon says. Nathan is thinking about slapping Simon to see what he'll do. Simon is thinking about hitting Nathan, but doesn't have the courage to at the moment.

'Leave him alone, Nathan,' Kelly says, thinking that this seems to be the only thing she says to him these days. Nathan looks at her and is now thinking about his balls and how he hasn't gotten laid in a few days.

Simon is thinking _thanks_, directly to her and Kelly smiles back.

If Simon and Nathan were in a fight, Simon would win, she thinks.

**Sumtimes nathan is SO annoyng i wan2 punch him. Me mate Cheryl sez that meens we'll get 2getha like in the films, but thats bollox. isnt it? **

4:25 PM Dec 11th 

'He must fancy you or something,' Cheryl says as the two lounge on Kelly's sofa, bottles of vodka in their hands.

'Fancy me? I don't think so, he's fucking annoying. I hate him.'

'Me and Ben hated each other when we first met and now look at me; I have a son.'

'Cheryl, Ben left you with a baby and fucked off with your cousin,' Kelly points out. Cheryl shrugs.

'I was still with him for two years before that. It's obvious Nathan likes you.'

'You've never met him; he's a prick.'

Cheryl rolls her eyes. 'Well, I think he sounds hot. Irish? Let's just say, I'd do that.'

'You'd do anyone,' Kelly replies, grumpily because she doesn't like the sound of Cheryl getting her claws into Nathan. Cheryl snorts and takes a swig of vodka.

'You get in there before someone else comes and snaps him up,' she says. Kelly stays quiet, brow furrowed in thought.

Maybe she would.

**nathan spilt a drink on me 2day. Cheryl says its like that notting hill film but i dont rememba hue grant calling julia roberts a clumsy cow **

5:10 PM Dec 14th 

Kelly is pretty sure Nathan did it on purpose.

He was sauntering towards her, cup of water in his hand and he could clearly see her, but somehow his drink found it's way over her front, cool water trickling down her jumpsuit. 'For fuck sake, Nathan!'

'Watch where you're going, you clumsy cow!'

'You saw I was coming,' Kelly glares, wiping at her boiler suit and cringing at the cool water against her skin. 'Fucking hell,' she scowls, going to punch him. Nathan leaps back with a yelp.

'It was an accident!'

'Bollocks was it,' Kelly snaps, shoving past him. 'You're a prick.'

'Are you always this full of kind words?' he asks. Kelly looks back at him and he grins, as if proud of himself.

'Just stay away from me,' she spits, eyes flashing angrily. Nathan says nothing, but looks oddly sincere for a moment.

'Fine,' he says finally and walks away, leaving Kelly behind this time.

**smne sed in their hed that I look like Stacey off of X Factor. That's first complament I've heard since I got my power. **

11:55 AM Dec 17th 

Kelly is strolling down the street, holding onto Ryan's hand, Keith's lead in the other when she hears it. _She looks like Stacey off X Factor. _

Kelly glances up, catching sight of a man walking down the street opposite her. He looks away from her and continues on his way to work, now thinking about having a bottle of red when he gets home that evening.

Kelly smiles to herself. Maybe this mind-reading thing isn't as bad as she thinks.

**F*ck me! She looks like she's been on one of them make over shows - if Gok Wan was replaced by my nan! **

10:09 PM Dec 17th 

Kelly's eyes are wide as she looks at Alisha; her hair is combed back into a bun and she's wearing a dress that looks like it's come from the 1940s or something. She's talking to Curtis and Curtis is less than impressed.

Curtis is thinking _What the hell has happened to her? It's like she's been brainwashed. This isn't my Lisha._

Alisha is thinking _I can't believe I was seeing this low life. He's such a loser. I'm so embarrassed about what I did in front of him. _

Whoa, Kelly thinks, because there has been some major change in events here. Kelly shakes her head.

'This is fucked up,' she says.

'I know,' Simon replies, wheeling his wheel chair forward to get a better look at Alisha and Curtis talking. 'Where's Nathan?' he asks.

Kelly shrugs. 'I don't know.'

'Oh,' Simon replies and that's all that is said on the matter. Kelly still feels bad for snapping at him the other day though, because he has kept his distance best he could.

She'll have to make it up to him.

**He's makin his own bed. Say wot u like but that's husband material! **

10:18 PM Dec 17th 

He's making his bed. Kelly doesn't say anything for a moment, just smiles as she watches Nathan humming to himself as he sets his blankets straight.

She likes him. She has to admit it because she knows there's no hiding from the fact now. She likes him, a lot.

Kelly grins. 'I bought pizza.'

**why dose every song on the radio remind me of nathan? i'm cryin at mariah fkin carey! **

8:40 AM Dec 21st 

And suddenly everything is gone, like part of her has been torn away. Nathan is dead and Kelly is alone once again.

This is worse than her dad leaving. This is worse than Lee leaving. This is worse than Jodi making her go bald.

This is Nathan.

Now, he's not here.

Mariah Carey is on the radio, Kelly sitting on the sofa, legs curled beneath her and Keith at her side.

"_The feeling that I'm feeling now that I don't hear your voice/Or have your touch and kiss your lips 'cause I don't have a choice/Oh, what I wouldn't give to have you lying by my side/Right here, 'cause baby (We belong together)…Who else am I gon' lean on when times get rough/Who's gonna talk to me on the phone till the sun comes up/Who's gonna take your place, there ain't nobody better…"_

Kelly is crying before she realizes it, face buried in her hands. Then, she gets to her feet and turns the radio off.

She can't bare thinking of Nathan, not when the pain is still fresh.

**u hear bout them ppl who've had a leg cut off but they can still feel it. thas what its like wiv nathan. he's gone but he's still itchin me.**

11:45 AM Dec 22nd 

Kelly enters the graveyard with trembling hands. She clenches them at her side and passes through the archway. Her feet tread lightly on the grass as she passes graves and headstones and tombs.

She can see Nathan's headstone up ahead and she slows as she approaches, staring down at it, at the words and willing them not to be true.

Kelly lets her tears run because it isn't fair. It's not fair that he was taken from her.

It's silent in the graveyard. Silent, so silent that even the birds are singing. Silent, so silent that even the wind doesn't rustle the words.

So silent, expect…

_I miss Kelly. I wish I wasn't buried here, because then I'd go and annoy her just so she'd hit me again. Yeah, I miss her the most. _


End file.
